This TED Video just arrived and confirmed what I am seeing at WiseEars.  Teens are communicating – LOUDLY by TEXT- Not by phone or email – BY TEXT.

It appears that they will TEXT to a total stranger to tell their most personal details and where they are most in pain.

I am finding some of these TEXT messages at WiseEars.   I am not only receiving emails about friendship problems and school work and the parenting “thingies” but now I am receiving messages about bullying and abuse, and big ticket items that need a professional response.

I have taken down my ad at the School District Offices and at the High Schools so that I can reword them, because without licensing and malpractice insurance I know I am at risk.  And because I did this kind of work when I was licensed and had insurance for so many years, I still want to figure out what to do and find the right source for kids to tap.

I am meeting with members of the Crisis Hot Line and Teen Crisis Hot Line in the next few weeks to see if we can get the phone companies to help us set up a national TEXT line.   I liked the suggestions in this video.   I can testify that we truly need this service and I am happy to be a part of the solution and the support network.

The scary folks are aware of the texting phenomenon also – and that concerns me greatly.

Please Watch this 5 minute TED TALK – it is important to share.

TEXTING THAT SAVES LIVES

IN OTHER WORDS:
Our Services
Depression Relief 
Teens Need a Good Listener
Bulling (from PatriciasWisdom)

Have you ever been listening to someone only to discover your mind has focused on something else and you have missed a large portion of what was being uttered?   Your brain has heard something, which has triggered a side trip to the conversation.  The brain likes shortcuts so will indulge in these kinds of transfers of focus more frequently over time as we age.   The elderly often do this because memories are much more practiced than what is going on currently.

One good way to practice is to do crossword puzzles, Sudoku, or listen to music and then try to repeat a passage out loud by singing or playing on a keyboard or other instrument.   I like to play card games to keep numbers in prime shape and also online word games with my family and friends.  It is important to talk about the word you chose and to hear it out loud.

Another excellent tool is listening to books on tape and of course reading a paragraph out loud from the newspaper or magazine you’re enjoying.  Sing along with your favorite group or movie; what fun!

The rule of thumb about keeping your listening skills vital is one should practice as often as one brushes their teeth a day.

It is one reason great meditators as they focus say OOHMM!

Our Professional Listening business grows with word of mouth referrals, we hope you will keep us in mind and share our spot with friends and family who need to be heard.

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IN OTHER WORDS:
Stress Relief: Nintendo BrainAge (at Patricia’s Wisdom)
The Social Animal (at Patricia’s Wisdom)
Satisfying Conversation (at Patricia’s Wisdom)
Alignment

I cannot eat ice cream any more, but this does not mean that the craving does not surface every time that I have a big decision to make, but now I use it as a time to get out my journal and have a serious conversation with myself.

Recently I read on TODAY’S PATH a post from Susan Blake about what different cravings are saying to you.   Susan has lots of knowledge about nutrition and has her own counseling practice and I just thought I would share her post with you because it is always good to learn the details of a new language when it is you talking to yourself.

What Do Your Cravings Mean?

Have you thought about the emotions that correspond to your food cravings?  What are they saying to you?

So who is listening to you?  Need to talk politics or make a big decision?  Got an emotion that’s big and needs venting?  We’re here at WiseEars to assist you and hear you!

Our business grows by referral.  Who do you know might enjoy this newsletter? Please subscribe and LIKE us on our Facebook page.

IN OTHER WORDS:
Alignment
The Right Formula
Our Services

Listening is an important resource which needs regular alignment and balance of your systems.   Just like when reading, one needs to look away from the current page to a wider perspective at least every hour, your hearing and eyes need a regular adjustment and wider territory to maintain alignment.

Not only is it important to look out and away into the distance, but it is important to listen to different sounds around you – close up and further away.  It is vital at least every 2 hours to make this adjustment when you are awake.  If you are listening to music, get up and listen to the rain falling.

If you can do your alignment practice outside, it is even better and the hearing tools and brain retrieval systems work even fast to create the adjustment.   On my walk, I not only listen to the sounds of my shoes on pavement, I listen for cars and trucks, and then I try to hear at least 4 different bird calls from farther away.   One day it was so snowy and quiet I truly had to capture the breeze in the highest tree tops to find a distanced sound.

At least once a day, it is important to work at balancing when standing on one foot and looking into the distance and secondly to bend over and dangle your head and ears down.  It does not count bending over and putting on your socks, because we are holding our heads in a purposeful position.  I am talking about laying your head and ears over the edge of the bed or letting your body and head dangle from the waist towards the floor; do not hold the body let it just hang there.

By realigning our balance, posture, breathing, vision, a number of times a day – including some good deep breathing – we create new and stronger pathways to the brain.  Our ability to think and hear is rapidly increased and then we can interpret and comprehend with greater acuity.
Professional listeners often yawn during a session, this practice is opening the ear passages and creating refreshed passages to the brain and one should not be offended or concerned about being boring!  Just means a new and stimulating idea is being enhanced.

So who is listening to you?  Need to talk politics or make a big decision?  Got an emotion that’s big and needs venting?  We’re here at WiseEars to assist you and hear you!

Our business grows by referral.  Who do you know might enjoy this newsletter? Please subscribe and LIKE us on our Facebook page.

Life just does not work that way; wishing does not make it a truth.

I just reviewed a book about a formula for figuring out exactly which belief is holding you back from finding your greatest success.  It is called THE CODE TO JOY (review at Patricia’s Wisdom)  and the two Psychologists who figured out this formula are not worried that they will lose business, on the contrary giving the formula for their change skills will only increase their client list and acts as amazing advertising for their skills.  One still needs someone to listen to what has been figured out and be guided in new ways of thinking and acting upon the changes they need to make.  If the individual is not a practiced thinker, they will need specific time with the psychologist to create the next formula for them to progress.

How to make decisions and changes based on new information is a learned skill that takes practice and usually someone to assist one in understanding and acting on the discoveries.

In the book THE ART OF THE SALE (Review at Patricia’s Wisdom) by Philip Broughton  there is a wonderful quote from one of the top salesmen/motivational speakers of all time:

“Most people want formulas, very, very, simple formulas.  A pitch.  That’s what they want from their churches too.  They want the preacher to give them a pitch they can live their whole life by. That will work in all situations.  They will always get the ORDER.  Which means getting into heaven.”
“…for the first eighteen years of your life, you’re learning to be like everybody else.  But from the age of eighteen on, what we should be learning is differentiation, uniqueness.  And what it usually takes for uniqueness to happen is a mind-blowing type of experience.” ~Lou Mobley  ( page 192)

In other words:  one needs to keep their mind open and practice flexibility.  One needs to understand the emotional and situational environment they are working in and how to think that through very quickly.

Who is listening to you and assisting you in making your best decisions and choices?   How do you practice your thinking flexibility skills? Do you need to figure out your MIND Blowing Experience?  WISE EARS is here to assist you and help you be your very best and help you lose the formula thinking.

Our practice grows by referral – Who do you know could use a copy of this newsletter or a subscription?
Who do you know could use being listened too?

In Other Words:
Automatic Negative Thinking
Basic Communications Model
Our Services

Some folks eat lots of foods to tamp down the emotions or bury them inside.  The hormonal release triggered by emotions are quick to happen – about 90 seconds and they are throughout the body;  the brain takes considerably longer to process the chemical information and respond.  We don’t need to rush away from lions and tigers much anymore, but we might have to dive out of the way of a fast approaching car.    The chemicals are still in our system, and we need water to flush them away or the body sends out other messages to assist you in storing those messages in your fat cells.

If we actually ran away from the fast approaching car, well the chemical messages would be used up and released through sweat and exhalations.   But what if we are watching a scary  news story or worried about our finances.  We are not  inclined to run away when watching TV or doing our income taxes.   The chemicals are still released.   What activity we do next is important to our self-nurturance and the transition of those emotions.

What if when one finished their taxes they went to the gym and did their workout, what if after hearing a tough news story we talked it out?   Chances are that those activities would help release the chemicals.

What if we eat those chemicals into us?  Bury the feelings?

What if they make it to the brain and stir up our negative thinking and those thoughts get on a continuous hamster wheel of repetition?

“Depression is an isolating force, and once you’re isolated with a bad mood, it feeds on itself. Exercise returns you out into the world. It feeds you in ways over and above the health benefits.   Dr. Michael Otto, Boston University

The most common way to alleviate depression is to talk about it.  A good listener can assist you in recognizing the emotions you are feeling and encourage you in ways to release these emotions so they become positive guides.  An excellent listener can help you retrain your thinking and assist you in discovering the first moves to relief and renewal.  A professional listener can assist in helping one stop the fearful messages from setting off unwanted reactions.

Most adult women do their problem-solving verbally or through journaling – they need to express the emotion and talk it through.

The folks at WiseEars are excellent, professional listeners and we grow by word of mouth referrals.  Please sign up for our newsletter and LIKE our Facebook page and share with others who you believe need to be heard.  Thank you.

In Other Words:
Basic Communications Model
Automatic Negative Thinking (ANTS) on Patricia’s Wisdom
Body Talk

Most of our emotions come from our gut because our brains are so very slow at getting us away from danger and fear because the thinking mode must take in the entire stimulus and run it through previously created pathways and then interpret as it has been trained to do.   If it is a new situation or experience, the brain must develop new pathways for the future.

The internal organs, specifically the digestive track are designed to get the messages out fast and efficiently and relay the message quickly to all the various parts of the body.  It is definitely important as a survival strategy.   It is vital to our health to learn how to hear what the body is saying on a daily basis.

Listening to the body is a learned skill.  Physicians and Naturopaths spend huge amounts of time learning how to listen to and interpret what a body is saying.  They predominately rely on test results and internal organ scans.

To save time and money, the doctor’s office may just make a diagnosis and then send you on to a class to instruct you in self-care.  They are going to want you to learn how to read your body with that dis-ease and how to take care of yourself.  Only 20 people out of 100 will actually learn what they need to know for the basics of survival and of those 20    FIVE (5) will use the information to improve their health and living.

A Professional Listener can assist you in training pathways in your brain to understand what your body is trying to tell you and how to make your medical visits more productive and helpful.  We also listen to people tell their own health stories and that often takes numerous tellings until the person understands and starts learning to use the information.

Do you know what you need to take with you to your next appointment, have you formulated the questions you need to ask  to be prepared and able to respond and learn?

Wise Ears grows with best with your word of mouth referrals.   Please sign up for our newsletter and we would love it if you would join us on Facebook.

Related Reading:
A Basic Communications Model
90 Seconds of Anger – 90 Seconds of Happiness
Your Medical Mind – A Book Review

Here is what Webster’s New Collegiate dictionary says:

Therapist = one specializing in therapy especially a person trained in methods of treatment and rehabilitation other than the use of drugs or surgery.

Counselor  = one who gives advice or counsel (e.g., marriage).  A lawyer is a specific type of counselor. The counselor is going to collect case related data and give guidance in professional matters utilizing psychological methods.

Listener = one who gives consideration and pays attention to sound; to hear; thoughtful attention.

A Social Worker is a therapist who works on a cultural level in socializing others and does a great deal of problem-solving along with data collection for society.  They are working on correcting problems according to the laws and rules of their society.  A social worker will often refer individuals and families to therapists, counselors, and workshops.

A Professional Listener may give a therapeutic response but their sole purpose is to fully listen to what the individual is sharing on as many levels as possible.  This involves getting folks “out of their heads” so that they can hear themselves think and sacred professional listening is listening to the whole being including the gut and the heart.  I have never found a religion without the element of sacred listening.   Although some people are naturally skilled at this, some are intuitive; most of us need to be trained.
Currently many of our religious institutions just want their congregants to listen to what the speakers say.   Power to the skilled Preacher.   If the preacher is not a good entertainer, then they need more and more sound bites for the individuals to take away.  The listeners are trained to memorize one or at the most 2 key phrases each experience.  They are expected to go to the speakers for interpretation and how to manifest this message.

Professional Listening allows the individual to think and analyze what the individual is  feeling and thinking and it opens  the door to more creative levels of problem-solving, more satisfaction and contentment, provides a self of achievement and the ability to respond with ethical intentionality.

Who is hearing what you have to say?  We are here for you at Wise Ears.

Our business grows best with word of mouth referrals?  Do you know someone who could use a good listen?

Contact us at – patricia@wiseears.com

Youth Group leaders, coaches, teachers, tutors, grandparents, are the first places that teenagers head, except for those young people who find  Television and the Internet to be their primary guides.  Teens will find someone, and those that have not learned good learning skills will figure out someone that they wish to emulate for guidance.   This is the major hook for gangs and cliques and a major part of their appeal and power base.

Along with social skills, organizational skills, this is an important time to teach and use journal writing tools in order for the teen to “get out of their heads”  and separate automatic thinking from applied thinking.

At a time in their lives when they are wishing they were like everyone else and not celebrating their new found uniqueness, this is a great time to gather up their accomplishments and point them in a great direction for their careers and wellbeing.  They may not need a counselor or therapist, but they may need someone to actually hear and sort what they are saying.  They may need someone to teach them how to use a journal to the max.  They may need someone to interpret those interests and career planning test scores with fresh ears.   They may need assistance in writing an essay or in discovering a weakness that needs some development.

Our best learning is done one on one.

They just may need a professional listening service, someone with good skills for listening and assisting teens in being the best they can be.

I have found my teenaged clients to be more internet savvy than their parents and have less trouble telling a professional listener what they need to ask – as a matter of fact many will chat, text, email and Skype complete strangers and tell them everything.   Just ask any police department in any city about this assertion.

So here we are a Professional Listening Service with a great reputation and master skills at working with teens.

We grow by word of mouth referrals – Do you know a teen that needs someone to listen and be heard? Do you know a teacher who could make a referral?    A minister?  A parent?

Who is listening to what you have to say?  Email us at: patricia AT wiseears.com

In Other Words:

Listening Services 
Automatic Negative Thinking (ANTS)
A Basic Communications Model
How We Make Decisions and Changes

Hyperactive people often have a radio playing or television going full time in their lives so as to not overload their circuits with thoughts or to slow those racing thoughts down.  Often caffeine will help them control their thinking until it slows them down so much they want to go to sleep or speeds the thoughts up so fast they cannot find focus.

Have you ever had a song or an idea get stuck in the circuitry of your brain?  I have heard this called an “ear worm”.   It only involves hearing if you sing that song out loud or say the thought or write it down and then read it.  Otherwise, it is just a random connection of words.  It can be a habit.

I have worked with a number of children who need some caffeine before taking a test or exam, it allows them to control their thinking and maintain focus without wiggling or tapping or doing other repetitive behaviors.  Some are hypersensitive to distracting behaviors by others, one child was overwhelmed by the drumming fingers of her desk partner and it just sent her nearly to sleep everyday or raised her anxiety levels to a fevered pitch and she could not focus on the lessons.

Are you self medicating with your morning coffee sugar coated cereal?  Could you get the same relief or need met if you were heard?

One of my instructors at the gym, finished her class and then proceeded to tell me how fat, dumb and stupid she was.  Three times a week this happened.  She was saying them out loud and letting me know that she was not such a terrific person.  I would not leave her side until she told me 10 wonderful things about herself and I held up my fingers until she did.  Often she would refuse, often she would distract by laughing;  I insisted until she could hear what she was saying about herself and understood she could change it.

This experience is called Negative Self-talk  or Automatic Negative Thinking (ANTS) http://patriciaswisdom.com/2008/10/factoid-friday-ants-or-automatic-negative-thinking/ and teenagers and young adults experience it about 100 times a day and they can get stuck in this mode easily, as though repeating the negative thoughts in their heads over and over makes it true. Teens and young adults are busy comparing themselves to others as they learn to achieve their goals and fit those goals to their personality and self-definition.  Advertising most often promotes negative thinking and it takes learned practice to override their influence.

So let’s say you want to change those old messages that are on repeat.  Step one is to get it out of your head.  Speak it and even better yet write it down.   Figure out what emotion is triggering or needing to be released by this repetition.  Really feel it.   NOW CHANGE IT.   Rewrite it and turn it around to something that speaks to your values.

The real problem with this in your head stuff is that one cannot hear what they are messaging inside. 99% of us need a little help to turn this around and help us shift our self talk to encouragement.

At Wise Ears we are here to hear what you need to say.  Let us assist you in reframing your message and getting on with the conversation.

Our business grows by referrals.  Thank you for sharing our presence with others.

In Other Words:

How to Read Poetry to Expand Your Heart 
You are Not Your Brain
Automatic Negative Thinking
A Basic Communications Model